By Sara Halcumb
I get it, starting jiu jitsu as a woman who has zero wrestling or combat training is incredibly intimidating. There are so many barriers and fears associated with stepping on that mats that it hinders most women from ever starting in the first place. Of course this isn’t the case for everyone, however I would say that the majority of gals need a little support to get started. In this article I will talk about how I was finally able to step on the mats, as well as provide some practical tips that still help me to this day. And if you already train, then this article may provide you with some valuable tips to give the women in your life who are too scared to start.
My journey onto the mats
To lay a quick foundation for you, my husband has a wrestling background and started training jiu jitsu right after we had our first child. So, I had been going to the gym with him for years, but always as a wife watching from the sidelines. This doesn’t mean that he didn’t try to get me to train, and for years my answer would be a firm, “Heck NO”!
So, what changed my mind?
My first step on the mats started with a weekly strength training class that the jiu jitsu gym offered, which my friend coached. Even though it was hard for me to begin, I had a great mentor in her and felt comfortable in the class. I had always been active in sports, so adding strength training to my routine was refreshing after pouring myself into raising our growing family. This class is called Suples Strength Training, and you can read more about how it can improve your jiu jitsu HERE.
The funny thing about making space for yourself is that it opens the door to self-improvement in all areas of life. I really loved the class and the friendships I was making, so I was thankful to have online classes at home when the gym had to shut down during the pandemic. This is where The Jiu Jitsu entered the chat for me personally. Thankfully our gym owners provided Zoom classes to members during lockdown, so ya girl had no choice but to become her hubby’s partner. It was like the powers that be basically gave me no choice. And this is how I started learning jiu jitsu… in my living room, wearing an oversized Gi, and an old white belt.
My jiu jitsu journey continued when the gym opened back up, and I was quickly learning that this life-long journey on the mats was making me physically and mentally stronger than I ever thought possible.
While my story on how I started jiu jitsu is unusual, there were other factors that helped me as a woman in a mostly male-dominated sport. Let’s dive into these helpful tips so that you or the female in your life can break through the fears and start training today!
Tips to starting jiu jitsu as a nervous female
- Start participating in fitness classes at the gym
This little hack really helped me take my first baby steps on the mats. Find a jiu jitsu gym that has a fitness class such as strength training or conditioning that you can attend each week. I hear many women say one big reason they are nervous to grapple is they aren’t yet comfortable being that physically close to other people. Try easing yourself into it by joining a class where you can gain confidence first. This way you are exposing yourself to the culture of the gym to see if it jives, and secondly, you are making friends with people who could potentially be your future training partners (the personal bubble problem will soon disappear).
- Try attending a women’s only class first
Another way I was able to continue my training was by starting in a women’s only bjj class each week. Most women are not comfortable rolling with guys when they first start out. I was lucky to have my husband to introduce me to grappling, but this isn’t the case for most ladies. So, if you can find a great women’s program at a gym, utilize it! Keep in mind most Professors will recommend that you train with more than just your favorite partners, so eventually you will want to branch out into more classes. But try not to worry about that for a while, just focus on learning, drilling, and finding a great mentor who can help guide you.
- Recruit a friend to come with you
As I said before, my journey onto the mats was unusual in that my husband trained and coached bjj. But what about the majority of females who have zero ties to the gym? This is where you convince that gal pal who owes you a favor into signing up with you. I have seen many women who are now absolute killers on the mats, start out training with a friend who they felt safe with. Learning to choke other people out isn’t for the faint of heart, but if you really want to start jiu jitsu, having a friend or two you can trust is key. Sooner than later, you will start to see that you each have your own journey and it is equally crucial to not compare your path to hers.
- Find a solid routine and healthy gym-life balance
Once you’ve overcome those internal fears and started your jiu jitsu journey, the fun begins. Making friends on the mats isn’t difficult, as most people who train are incredibly kind and helpful. This is where you can branch out and start attending more classes with or without your female training partners. If you are at a good gym, the culture should be welcoming enough that you feel comfortable trying all the classes. Find a consistent routine where you can attend the same classes each week as there is so much to learn. However, now we are getting into tricky territory… because more than likely you are totally addicted to jiu jitsu at this point. Don’t feel bad, it happens to the best of us! Along with finding a steady routine, it is equally important to maintain a balance between gym and life. Jiu Jitsu is a marathon, not a sprint… so if you can take a rest day or two each week, then your risk for burnout or injury will decrease.
- Don’t stop training when it gets hard
By now you are undoubtedly gaining confidence and growing stronger physically and mentally. Jiu Jitsu is known to be a saving grace for many people, yet I would be lying to you if I said that it has never broken my heart. I can’t count how many times I’ve driven home with the music off contemplating my life choices. As a female (or anyone for that matter) starting out in this sport, you will feel vulnerable, stupid, weak and exposed. While scary, these are all good things, because it means that you are growing as a person. You can’t overcome your weaknesses without finding out what they are in the first place. It’ll take a little time, but the pursuit of self-improvement will seep into every aspect of your life. Keep going and soon enough you will be the one to help the next nervous woman who steps on the mats for the first time.